what if this earthquake is what they say it will be? what if it was more?
what would be convenient for me is that it would be a reason for me to quit doing what is socially acceptable without being liable of blame. it wasnt my fault the school is a twisted pile of rubble. it isnt my fault i am the last of my family. it isnt my fault i have nothing left. it isnt my fault i stole this boat because the owner and his entire family is dead and so will i if i dont take this boat and leave the country. (god, i did not mean that literally.)
what i want is something to happen that will make it easy for me to abstract from the culturally ordained responsibilities that bind me to do what i am "supposed" to do. Not be scorned at for just wanting to enjoy the fruits of my labor on my terms. Not have to be a slave to my labor because thats how the industry (culture) is.
say i quit all this, and live the rest of my life a pirate, thief, mercenary, smuggler and travel the world depending on what jobs or interests lure me. people wouldnt call me stupid as much if i had a good reason for doin so.
such as an earthquake obliterating everything i have that binds me to this lifestyle.
"think about the poor kids in africa"
no. fuck. you.
that is the way of life there, this is the way of life here. yea, at first look, my predicament is a far cry favorable than mohammed in darfur but does that mean i should just pipe down and go on living the way i do? i have just the same about of reason and right to improve my quality of life as he wants to. his being surviving day to day, just making sure his stomachs full and to some how find a way, regardless of moral, to sustain himself and his family because he is on the brink of starvation. me simply feeling suffocated by "duties" i find are fruitless and lead to something completely without substance. yea, atleast im not dying, or being exterminated, but still, it is no reason for me to stand still and let life pass me by.
work is the curse of the drinking classes